Posts tagged curvy
Posts tagged curvy
Free-form “drawing/painting” done in MS Paint, by yours truly.
If you wanna alter it, add backgrounds, smooth it out, etc. feel free. My only condition is that you credit, and I WANNA SEE. ;D
As many of y’all know, I’m an artist, a singer, a performer, —and a curvy girl. So a while back, I had an idea about this thing I called the Plus Size Pride Project.:) If you’ve already heard about it, then my apple-ologies, but as I’m writing about it elsewhere tonight, I thought it might be worth mentioning again here, in case it missed anybody who might wanna join in. :) (And btw; it can include bellydancers and non-bellydancers alike. ;D)
So, down to the nitty-gritty! Anyone 18 and over who wears a size 16 & up is hereby invited to come participate in a little photo collage I’m workin’ on, that in essense, is all about YOU. About US. And about showing the world how awesome and fabulous one can be, REGARDLESS of size. ^_^ The theme is showing the world that curvy people CAN and DO live happy, healthy, fabulous & fulfilled lives, RIGHT NOW, AS THEY ARE, whether they plan to lose weight or not. :) How that’s illustrated will be in the form of each person submitting a self-portrait, which demonstrates exactly what makes each individual feel most confident, joyful, beautiful & proud. ^_^
So.. for example; if you’re dancer and your costume or your dance makes you feel beautiful, take a a pic w/you in your dance garb, or of you in mid-sashay. ^_^ Or if you’re a proud mom and you love your arms because they let you hold your kids, take a picture w/you embracing your little ones. And so on. :)
People can share (loving, thoughtful) messages on placards (i.e. pieces of paper or posterboard) if they want (though nothing horrendously political please- just stuff about loving who you are and living your life for today in a size-positive way)- or not, as they like. :) And pics can be taken w/anything; from a cell phone camera to a fancy SLR on a tripod, or anything in between. :) You can dress as simply or as fancily as YOU like, wear makeup or go bare-skinned (just so long as you’re PG-13- so no major nudity please), and when it’s all done, photos will be made into a 2D collage, as well as crafted into a video, which will be put onto YouTube. :) For more info feel free to PM me, or visit my info page, at http://alternate-visions.blogspot.com/2013/03/the-plus-size-pride-project.html
Plus, we also have a group on FB, for anyone who’d like a supportive, protected environment in which to discuss the project, talk w/other people about ideas, fears etc., or ask me direct questions, if they’d like. :) To join, just visit https://www.facebook.com/groups/plussizephotoproject/?fref=ts, and hit “Join” to apply. Membership is by approval only (to protect people from trolls & ne’er-do-wells) and you don’t -need- to join the group to participate in the project. It’s just been made available to act as a resource for anyone who might like to have it. :)
Anyhoo, hope y’all dig, and thanks so much for readin’ all this! And if you know someone whom you’d like to participate, feel free to spread the word! ♥ ♥ ♥
To my fellow fluffygirls on a budget: Shrugs can be GREAT for Tribal bellydance, but I’ve seen ‘em used for Cabaret girls who needed some coverage, too. :) So if you’re in need of a shrug (or two, or three) that can be used for day-wear, club-wear OR dance-wear, go check out JC Penney online and Rose’s Department Stores! ^_^
JCP has this shrug online for just TWELVE BUCKS, and Rose’s has an array of cute shruggies for just TEN DOLLARS! ..And guess what? They BOTH have ‘em in sizes up to 3x!!! ^_^ I just scored the JCP one in-store through their online shop (via salesperson- as I’d looked online for their shrug & couldn’t find it), and they’ll even send it to my local store for FREE pickup, so I don’t have to pay for shipping. ^_^
Plus I snagged a TOTALLY cute lace-backed shrug at Rose’s that I’ve been positively DROOLING over online- for like aaaages!!! XD (In totally unexpected fashion, too! My gramma suggested we hit Rose’s, I hadn’t been there in YEARS, so I happily acquiesced- and BOOM, there it was!! ^_^) And to top it all off? I could still afford a bodacious little zebra print tank top, as well as fluttery li’l white shrug! (I know, *gothgasp*! ;D) And they’ll ALL work great for everything from daily life to performances- if paired w/the right duds. ^_^
Now sadly I think Rose’s is predominantly a Southern chain, but don’t quote me on that! If you’re interested, check out their parent company’s web site here to see if they have a Rose’s (or one of their similar stores) near you. :) And if they don’t? No fear! JCP is national (if not INTERnational now), so girls, if you’ve been trying to find a cute shrug to stomp the town with or bellydance in WITHOUT breaking the bank, we have GOT you. ^_^
AyayayayayayayayayayAY!!! YOU GO GIRL!!
LOVE the outfit, LOE the dancing, adore the hair, and best of all, LOVE the CONFIDENCE!!! You SHINE, mama!! *claps* Lilililililililili-yyyyiiiip!!!!
drum solo to shimmy shakedown by issam houshan
Fantastic drum solo! Beautiful costume! Amazing and gorgeous dancer!
Now I have one more person I wanna be when I grow up. ^_^
Enter; the lovely & badass Nisha.
..How cool is she???
EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! I JUST GOT MY FIRST PAIR OF REAL JEANS- EVAR, and they are SO CUTE!!! Granny and I went to WM to raid their Halloween section fro long-sleeved shirts (as I had none here, and it’s gotten delightfully nippy), n’ on the way home, she wanted to stop at Cato. So while she was looking, I was just kinda lazily browsing, and spotted an ADORABLE pair of jeans.
But a; they were jeans, and b; they were totally kick-ass, so I kinda mentally wrote ‘em off. I started flickin’ through the 3 or 4 whole pairs on the rack, and.. oh my gords… THEY HAD MY SIZE!!! O.O
So, mildly entertained but not getting my hopes up, I waited for a while to get into the dressing room, n’ at last, was able to give ‘em a go. I know my history w/jeans though, so you cannot imagine my surprise when about halfway up, I started to have this strange, tingling sensation.. the suspicion that they might, ohmydeargods, actually work. ^_^ (Regardless of size, every girl knows what I’m talking about here. We usually know by at -least- halfway up whether or not a pair of pants is worth struggling with to get on.) And as they continued skyward, the feeling just grew. *thumpthump, thumpthump* ..And my heart rate increased.
Next thing I knew, the things were gliding smoothly up to my waist.. with no trouble.. and I was starting to giggle deliriously. I had this bizarro, mixed feeling of disbelief and elation bubbling up in my chest simultaneously.. while I was desperately trying w/the majority of my psyche not to get all worked up. I still had the zipper and button to go, and we all know that those are often the worst parts.
But after a minute, they were buttoned, and then.. zzzzip! And that’s when it was time for that last, scary moment- the moment where it could all go to hell in a handbasket, regardless of how they *felt.* Again, most girls know this moment well. It’s that nigh-heart-stopping moment when you turn to look in the mirror. ..So I was already bracing myself for the excitement to pop like an over-inflated bubble…
And that’s when, despite all my suspicions & fears… They WORKED. They actually WORKED!!! Dear gawd!!! O.O
..But no.. that’s not even it… They were.. somehow, oh my stars.. how could this be?? Yes.. they were.. SUPER CUTE!!! ON ME!!!! O.O
*confusion, wonder, disbelief, -elation* My brain could barely register it all.
*falls over inside*
Now.. many of you might not realize why I’m going over every detail of this, or why I think this occurrence is so remarkable. It’s just a chick putting on a pair of pants.. right?? Well.. yes and no. Most girls have body issues, and many of us have struggled w/finding clothes that fit our body type, REGARDLESS of what type or size that is. But when you’re a big girl, and especially when you grew up being a big girl, this kind of occasion is HUGE. (Just as it would be for many in various situations, who often felt like an outsider for physical or other reasons.) As silly as it might seem to some, this was a total benchmark; especially as one who grew up in the 80s & 90s; when jeans were such a HUGE part of the (counter) culture. I guess I’d be in the same boat if I were in the flapper era- ‘cause I doubt super-straight dresses would work on me, either.
I once owned a pair of black, stirrup stretch jeans when I was in my teens (*lol* I know, I know ;)), but gawd I hated them. They were just symbols of how desperately I was trying to fit in, and for various reasons, wasn’t. They weren’t the jeans that everyone else had, (yanno, NORMAL jeans) and as usual, they were just another reminder of how I had to shop in “the big ladies’ stores” (what my mother calls places like Lane Bryant and.. well.. back then.. Lane Bryant). Mine were technically lyrca-infused fatgirl jeans, n’ though they didn’t LOOK too bad, I hated how stiff and thick they were, and how it felt like I creaked when I walked. It felt like I was wearing someone’s old skin over my own, or an alligator’s tough old hide over mine. I’d try to wear them off & on to “break them in,” but that whole denim standard just never seemed to work, and eventually, I got rid of ‘em. (Though it took me FOREVER to do so. They just sat in my pants drawer, looking forlorn for WAYYY too long, until they were simply too small to wear.)
..And eventually, over the years, I just stopped trying.
Of course secretly, I always kinda wished I could own just ONE pair of cute jeans. Just ONE. (I dunno, I guess I just figured that as an American, shouldn’t EVERYONE have at least ONE pair of jeans?? *shakes head* Yes, I know it’s stupid, but it’s just one of those secret little things I dreamt of as a kid, and which I suppose pop culture seeded into my brain. I guess I just never really got over it.. entirely.) I didn’t care what style they were, really. I’ve always thought overalls were precious, and another pair of “jeggings” might actually work, if I could find the right kind. But ftmp they were put out of my mind. ..Kinda like my hope of trying to find a decent, plus-size-friendly snowsuit. ;\
I just figured jeans would never really be for me. I don’t have the money to buy the expensive stuff or get a pair tailored, so I never bothered w/the denim section in stores. (Even in the fluffy-chick sections.) It was just too depressing, embarrassing, upsetting & aggravating to try again and again and again w/no success, so the closest I ever came to “looking for” jeans was to note a cute pair on telly, or admire some flashy ones w/an appreciative nod as I walked by them in the Junior’s or “regular” section (as I made my way to the “fat-chick clothes”). Being plus-size has always meant wearing the ugly, the plain, and/or the matronly, and up until recent years, we big girls have been taught to think that that’s just our frigging lot in life. But OF COURSE I wanted those spangly, decorated, cartoon-covered, graffiti-ed, lace-inlaid, torn-kneed, dark & super-“skinny”, fashionably fabulous jeans. Despite what I wear most of the time, I have always been a fan of fashion, and for a long time, even considered going into the design business. I’ve always been keenly aware of what I was missing out on. And it SUCKS. But you suck it up. You live, and dea w/whatcha got.
Jeans “just weren’t for me,” so why bother?
And THAT’S what makes this kind of thing so remarkable. I found a pair of jeans I -ADORE,- when I wasn’t even looking. I had almost lost even those last, tiny, faint & dying vestiges of hope that I’d ever find SOMETHING in the jean world to fit me. Not something matronly and plain mind you. Something CUTE. After a lifetime of tries & failures (even trying on stuff I didn’t like- just to see if it would work), I’d given up 99.99% on finding anything- ever. (And that last .01 percent? It had alllllmost faded down to non-existence too.) Plus, thanks to The Jeans Dilemma, I pretty much had written off all denim; outside of occasionally mooning over fabulously funky jean jackets- which I can’t resist when decorated w/pins and buttons and such. ;))
So this “happenstance” occurrence (to me) is an AMAZING, mind-blowing, almost life-changing thing. *beams* Here I am, thirty-something years old, and I just bought my first pair of REAL jeans. ^_^ I am realizing a childhood dream. -Even if it is a seemingly minor, superficial one. :) And even though I’ve come to peace with (hell, grown to love) my outcast, weirdo nature, I’m realizing how much that one piece of unfulfilled childhood meant to me. Jeans were a symol of belonging, of being “normal,” and to not have that meant a lot more than I realized, I guess. ..It’s kind of incredible how tiny, little moments like this can mean soooo much to somebody.. huh..?
It sort of reminds me of those makeover shows on TV. I like ‘em for just this reason. ’Cause it’s not just about the clothes. :)
And the best part? These jeans are SUPER swank. ^_^ They are dark blue, blinged out and studded, w/REAL pockets in the back (and those have kick-butt studding on ‘em too). :) They have gentle kitty whiskers & just the right shading in the wash on the legs, and I positively LURVEZ them. ^_^ (But somehow they weren’t over $30.. which makes a MAJOR difference to me, given my tiny budget. Which means they were affordable AND schmexy, making this absolute serendipity. ^_^) ..Honestly? I love them so much, I pulled them out of the bag once I got in the car n’ held them to my chest-and rode that way-all the way home; just as excited and eager and bubbly as a little kid. (Yep, I know I’m a dork. ;) Now let’s just thank God I don’t drive! ;D) If I can, I’ll snap a pic for you guys (as Cato doesn’t tend to feature many clothing items on their site; given the quantity of merch. they go through). Buuuut I’ll also see what I can drum up online. :)
I fully intend to wear them w/my Belladonna tank top, shrug & light belly gear. ^_^ Hell, they’re so cute I could honestly wear ‘em w/anything. ^_^ So happy!! ^_^
..And I have Cato & my grandmother to thank for that. ^_^
Note: I know this isn’t tremendously bellydance-related, but it IS big-girl related, and as this blog is about more than just bellydance, I wanted to share it w/you all, here. :) I figured it might make a difference to other fluffy girls out there, maybe give folks of every size hope, and who knows? Maybe it’ll get Cato a little more business for their PS department. :) They may not always be my bag stylistically, and they do a lot of clingy knits and narrow-hipped tops that I don’t think quite make sense for big girls (imo), but it’s GREAT to know they have some superb pieces, and that they’re OPEN to working w/fuller-figured ladies. Some stores don’t even make the effort, and Cato can have some -really- cute stuff. *points up* Case in point. ;)
Plus, they have a GREAT discounted jewelry section- and other folks might dig the shoes & bags that often go on clearance. Especially if you’re lookin’ for good work-appropriate clothes, for girls on a budget, Cato can be a fun place. ^_^ ..Besides, I shimmied in them while gazing at myself in the changing-room mirror, just to see how they’d look w/BD gear… *grins wryly* So.. doesn’t that count? ;D
Love, Light, & Sooooo Much Laughter,
Yours truly, taken by my mom this weekend on the beach. :)
Hope ya like. :)
This weekend I danced at my first non-school-associated gig evar. ^_^ It was both lots of fun, aaaand hectic as all get-out; because I was both dancing AND vending that day- and it seemed everything was kinda going’ free-form & plan-free- except for the event schedule. *lol* (I also had no idea I’d have nowhere to change into my belly garb- so.. *laughing* yeah.. I kinda came in regular clothes.. and that kinda got done behind my dance partner who held my veil up between me & potential on-lookers, and 2 closed sides of an open “green room” tent. *lmao* Eventually it got done though, and despite literally shaking like a leaf on a tree at first, I think it went okay! :D
Dancng with the gorgeous Kindle (who invited me to dance at the event) was so much fun, and she knows SO MUCH more about bellydance that it just blows my mind. (Yet she still calls herself a beginner! o.O) We improv’ed the whole show pretty much, and essentially did 4 songs, all by the seats of our pantaloons. ;) As far as the vending went, I didn’t sell anything that day, but it was so lovely seeing friends, having them there to support me, and dancing with Kindle that the sales part really didn’t matter too much. :) Ooh! But I might have made a friend or two in the process, so.. that was another blessing. X)
Our set consisted of me starting w/an outlined improv to Audrey Levine’s “Egyptian Ella,” then Kindle dancing to “Rusted Railway” by Dirtwire. Then the two of us danced together completely free-form to DeScribe & Smoolik’s “Modern-Day Moses” (which is so, SO freakin’ catchy!) and lastly came Beats Antique’s instrumental version of “Came to get Down.” I sword-danced my way through “Modern-Day Moses” (which actually turned out pretty well, despite the crazy-nerves ;)), and Kindle positively shined all the way through, w/o a single prop. :) (In fact, I wanna be as radiant as Kindle someday, “when I grow up.” ;))
Lastly, while we all know that being photographed from below is rarely flattering (regardless of figure- but especially for us big girls), I really hope that you dig these photos as much as I do- if not more! :) These were my favorites out of all the beautiful pics that Amodeo Photography took of our performance, and I wanna give huge props to them- ‘cause I know that taking pics of big folks isn’t always easy. ♥ While I wish I could make my middle and my chin smaller, I hope folks see the passion & joy in ‘em, and not just some fat girl making a git of herself. ;)
Saturday definitely taught me many things- but at least where pics go, I learned that every moment outside the dressing room (and sometimes even in it!) are places where a dancer may be photographed; so I gotta work on things like being prepared in ANY scenario for pics, keeping a library of poses ready for off-stage AND on-stage shots, and on keeping a more natural smile on-stage. (Not to mention preventing “sword face-” which I totally thought I’d mastered- until I saw some of the other pics in the event’s original set. *lol*)
It’s funny.. in prepping and dancing I always enjoy how I look and feel. (Unless I’m busy trying to pull one costume element free from another- ‘cause it always happens in places I can’t reach, and something’s ALWAYS getting caught on somethng else. ;)) ..But then, when I see pics of myself, I get sooooo hateful and critical! I try not to, but I often end up scrutinizing images of myself & hating what I see. :P Does everyone pretty much do this, or is it just me..? I hate it! I make myself and others feel bad as I pick myself apart, even though I may be proud of myself for doing x activity, or if I had the time of my life doing y. Why do we DO such things to ourselves..? It’s so dumb!! :P I AM becoming proud of who, and what, I am, and am working -really- hard to build my self esteem and not hate myself- inside, or out. ..But sometimes, it isn’t easy. And I find especially when I take a look at pictures of me and everything’s not “Perfect..” it’s especially hard… Do you know what I mean..? *shakes head* So, beginning today, I resolve to try & change this about myself. :)
While I may not be happy with every curve I see in the mirror or in photos, I hearby resolve to love ALL OF ME, not just PARTS of me. Every bit of me is worthy and deserving of love, and it takes allll of this body to do what I do; to dance and to practice, to move and be the person I am- at my best and my worst. It takes every piece of me inside & out to go up on stage, and have the courage to face the world- to let everyone and everything in, because whether most folks know it or not, that’s much of what stepping onto a stage means. It means that you’re willing to show the world what you’ve got, and subject yourself to everyone’s thoughts, feelings & opinions of you- no matter how critical or positive they may be. AND THAT TAKES GUTS.
I need to start recognizing that courage in myself, and appreciating not only it, but the love that I do have in my life, from the people who ARE supporting me. Being so hateful of myself, my images and the things I do does a disservice to them, too. It devalues their gifts of love and support, and treats those gifts as if they’re not worth anything, because I’m too busy w/criticizing myself to notice the love & appreciation I DO have in my life. ..:P So from here on in, I’m gonna try ant stop that nonsense. :)
I AM beautiiful, dammit. I need to start celebrating that fact, and be grateful for every bit of this body’s beauty & strength. I need to start appreciating it more, as well as the people who support me, and recognize this HUGE blessing that I have- that I have this body to move, no matter WHAT size it is. ♥♥♥
We should be proud, rally ‘round, and relish our accomplishments, no? We gotta take a time out to ENJOY our bright times and our achievements! *beams* So, I’m sharing these photos w/you. :) Here’s hoping these make you smile too (in the GOOD way), and that maybe they inspire other folks to go out and dance (or dream, or sing, or write, or do whatever), too. :)
Oh! And Kindle says she may very well have video of our last few songs coming soon, so as soon as those surface, I’ll let y’all know. :) Thus far I don’t think anyone got video of my “Egyptian Ella” piece, but if not, someday I’ll just have to dance it again for you on YouTube. ;) (But, if someone did get my Summer Solstice Fest “Egyptian Ella” performance, I would be tremendously grateful for a link to your video! ^_^)
Huge gratitude to Amodeo Photography for their beautiful photos, kindness & support, to Downtown Blacksburg for having us, and again, Kindle for inviting me to dance w/her onstage, and to share in that tremendous experience. ♥♥♥
Many Grateful Cheers,
YES!!!! Way to go, my fellow fluffy bellydancing sister! ^_^ YOU LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!
It is SUCH a pleasure to be able to share stuff like this w/folks.
See? Big girls CAN be gorgeous too. ^_^
ROCK ON, MAMITA!!! SO much love and respect to you! ♥♥♥
Sneak peak un edits, but my face with the sword is like “o_O please don’t drop it tis so heavy”. It is way heavier than what I have been use too.
I made the tribal fusion bottom half BTW. Very easy if anyone wants the tutorial drop me a message.
And somehow, just after I saw the last video I most recently posted about, this awesome woman came to mind. My dear friend Reya had had this posted up as her profile image for a while on Facebook, and while I don’t find this woman “Classically Pretty,” there’s something about her that I positively adore.
She is strong, (maybe even haughty?), daring, and practically challenging the viewer to slip forth a nasty remark, or let out a derisive snigger. She is clearly a proud, courageous Big Woman, and I love that. ^_^ Although I know this image may not deal precisely with bellydance; as a fellow big lady and a bellydancer, images like this hearten me in ways I cannot describe, and give me courage to be that proud, strong woman that I see in this lady’s posture, in her manner, in her eyes.. and in that very small hint of a smile… :)
She is a fellow adorned, tattooed, black-clad, curvy, fluffy, fat lady, and she’s challenging the world with her presence and her “I am here, try to move me” demeanor. :) I find that immensely inspiring, and thus, insanely beautiful. And I hope that in some way (even if it’s not the shouting out loud & getting all proud manner that I feel somewhere deep inside), that you do too. :)
Dancing in Dreams of Foxy, Fat Womens’ Strength,
(PS: If any of you know who this woman is, I would be incredibly grateful to know her name, so I could research her more. :) Thank you so much!)